What if what you are constantly seeking is HERE right now ? what if what you search in your deepest soul's longing is what you ARE ? . You are not ready- you are All-ready. an Unwaveringly presence ; inclusive of all experiencing. The mother of life.
what ever words are shared on this blog are a lie. But keeping quiet is also felt like a betrayal to who I AM.
I have felt a fire in my belly for the search of "truth" since I was a very young age.Throughout my life I have undertaken all sorts of training on inner exploration, to deepen my self- awareness. All have served as a magnificent stepping stones to discover this.
Some examples of the seeking days included shamanic healing, holotropic breathwork, mindfulness training, a tons of cpd hours in the psychotherapeutic field of various modalities... focusing psychotherapy, compassion focused therapy training , TA, psychodynamic , group analysis, person centred training approaches.. all necessary pointers to this inner revelation. People have portals of a wide range, some healthy others not so healthy , but they are all portals to the inner truth lying dormant within.
You name it.
I have searched and searched to satisfy the thirst in my soul for ...the "truth".
Do you resonate ?
It is my belief that it is what most people are seeking for, in one way or another...
Through the next step on the ladder of their career, through the next training, the next acquiring of material wealth .
Like standing on sinking sand, all this search is ephemeral; As the excitement of the new: the new car, job, and qualification, begins to wear off at some point. With a little close attention to the truth in your heart , each human knows deep within this isnt what brings them joy. Life goes on an autopilot, and we move faster, on the sinking sand... and perhaps drowning even more which requires us to move even faster.
Before we know it we are burnt out, fatigued, dissatisfied, with a void inside our hearts we are relentlessly aiming to fill. Trapped in a vicious cycle. The rat race, the treadmill.
This outer treadmill is often a reflection of the inner treadmill. Of course context is hugely important here. Sometimes we have no choice but run that threadmill.. until choice coms forth; and sadly it is when life is calling us home by breaking us wide open.
We wrongly assume and identify with a seperate self/ let's call it ego; upon which we have built all of our sense of existence and our ways of relating to the world outside of us.
It can be incredibly challenging to break away from the patterns of thought emotion behaviour we have been conditioned from our upbringing society, and our ancestral lineage.
Breaking free does not necessitate avoiding. IT is quite the opposite. A radical opening to what- is. Only through persevering observations of this excellent mechanics of our own minds, whilst holding on to an unwavering curiosity and openness to truly discover our essence, can we break free from this limited self.
There are SO many traditions, schools of thought, approaches, and tools for this , so called enlightment and awakening. The mind, the human hive, can grab at all this and create a total fantasy about "what s needed to get there". It can create yet another destination to aim for.
This is fine, this is it's job.
I feel the radical temptation to steer away of all definitions of terminology. Language cannot capture the ineffable; words cannot capture the wordless. .
However, before this blog, amidst the daily motherhood duties, come to an end..
I want to leave you with an invitation...
How willing are you to let go of all that you have known, the familiar, the certain, for the radical , unboundless limitless ground of your being ? It takes courage, for sure, and relentless examination of your inner world. The awakening journey can be messy and intense. A lot of teachers out there don't prepare you for this. Yet again, it is So life enriching that life takes a turn on it's own ; you let go and are being carried over by this greater intelligence and then ....life can become a mystery, so long as we are prepared to let go of the mastery.
I m not going to say it takes time, because for this there would be a resting in yet another limited sense of identity. Who am I to know that it takes time? Time is also seen hereas an illusionary concept ( another blog willo come soon). But for you, my friend, it might take a second, a minute, a week. I can only talk about the experience in the story of Maria. We are certainly amidst a global awakening process; the old paradigm is melting before our eyes; our old coping strategies no longer work r( thank godness for that!).
You can only discover this for yourself. There is no guru out there except your inner guru . However , if people in the name of devotion feel called to follow a particular guide teacher that resonates, that is also welcome. Keep questioning and keep remaining open.
May you BE.
Peace & light to all human beings
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